alex asunder

May 5, 2009, 2:14 pm
Filed under: football | Tags: , ,

MASSIVE fixture tonight at the Grove.

This is THE game of the season. It’s all or nothing.  The Gunners need two huge goals to thwart United’s shot at glory.

Arseblog reminds us of the enemy we face:

Remember, the guy or girl to your left or right is an Arsenal fan. The boys in red are your team. Our team. United are the enemy. United would kill your mum. They’d run over your puppy and then point and laugh. They would make you listen to Phil Collins. They would insist on putting cloves on everything. They would dip their pizza in ketchup. They would offer you a cup of coffee then serve you chicory. They would force you to watch Tom Hanks films. They would kidnap you then read to you from the novels of Dan Brown. They would drive really slowly in front of you when you’re in a hurry then speed up so they get through the amber light and leave you stuck at the red. They would chew gum loudly in your ear. They would come on our pitch and dance after getting one of our players sent off because of their theatrics. They would score a goal in the last few minutes of a semi-final then show everyone their hairy chest. They would dive to win a penalty to stop us going 50 games unbeaten. They would sing disgusting songs about our manager.

Need I go on? They are not our rivals, not our competitors, not our competitors, not our peers: they are the enemy. Treat them as such.

And in the face of such monstrous evil, such hideous, diving, tantrum throwing, ballerina, monster faced malevolence, make sure you let our lads know that they are fighting the good fight, on the side of truth and righteousness. For, after all, we are The Arsenal.



Leave a Comment so far
Leave a comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: